21

21 is a unique number, it has special meaning for a variety of reasons:  to mathematicians, it’s a number made up of 2 prime numbers;  to our armed forces, it’s an honor when you receive a 21 gun salute; to the black jack players, it’s a moneymaker and to our everyday folks, it’s the number of days needed to establish a new pattern in your life.

I had heard many years ago, from a good friend of mine, that 21 is a magical number if you want to change a particular pattern of behaviour, such as sticking to a diet or trying to stop smoking.  At that time I did some research and found a self-help book written in the 60’s by Dr. Maxwell Maltz.

Dr. Maltz reported that it took 21 days for amputees to  stop feeling phantom limb pain and from that research, came the Maltz Principle.  His research made him conclude that if someone consciously performs a new behaviour for just 15 minutes a day for 21 days, that individual could create a new long lasting habit.   His theory revolves around concentrating on forming a new habit and  before focusing on the results that this new habit could bring you (losing weight, bulking up at the gym, stopping smoking).

While I do believe that changing behaviours and establishing new habits can take some people years, we probably do create new comfort  levels in a shorter period of time,  which make performing new activities, or stopping old activities, alittle easier, even though it still may be with conscious everyday reminders, like alarms or notes on a calendar. Dr. Maltz said, “To change a habit make a conscious decision, then act on that behaviour.”

I have been participating in the 21 days of Gratitude program and when I started it, I was curious as to why 21 days and not 14 days or any other random number.  I remembered what I read about forming new habits in 21 days.  I wonder if this has to do with the length of the program.  I am noticing that I don’t need a reminder on my calendar anymore or click through the daily email reminder the Mentor Channel sends out.  We are on day 19 and I consciously go to the website to listen to the daily affirmation.  It has become a part of my regular routine and once the program is ended, I will continue to practice gratitude and meditate for at least 15 minutes a day.

Dr. Maltz wrote several self help books and another theory of his has to do with how an individual can improve their self image, which could lead to a more fulfilling life.  Many of us that are struggling with chronic illnesses are often down on ourselves and have a low self image because of the lifestyle we are forced to lead.  Dr. Maltz believed that if a person did not have an accurate and positive view of themselves, all of their goals and efforts will end in failure.  I believe this is true as I have learned the hard way over the past few years.  He believed that an accurate self image, helps us set goals that we can successfully accomplish.

At the beginning of my illness, I forced myself to do things that ended in failure, either as a result of me doing the task poorly or incorrectly or having my body crash and force me to bed for days.  This pattern of  behaviour made me feel worthless and useless and this pattern continued for a while, until I started to accept my illness and live within my current limits.

Changing my image of myself to a positive nature, came with my understanding when to stop a task, so that I can complete it correctly and feel good about what I accomplished.