Writing 101: A Character Study

characterwelcome

 

Shortly before this course started, I posted a blog about 4 incredible women that I have met in the years since I’ve been ill, but I don’t want to talk about them today.  Today I want to describe a man that has touched my heart and my life in ways that no one else has and probably never will.  He isn’t my boyfriend or my husband or my partner, but he is my truest friend that I could ever wish for.

I met this man close to 20 years ago when we both worked for the same company and we have both changed a lot since then.  I remember being intimidated by his stature at first, because he was an ex navy officier, who stood up straight, walked with a steady and deliberate gait (even in his cowboy boots) and had the biggest belt buckle I have ever seen.  His thinning hair was covered by a 10 gallon cowboy hat and his silver trimmed glasses highlighted his kind eyes. Beneath all of these clothes was a man who exuded positivity, warmth and love.

When he walks into a room, he commands respect, but not in a snobbish, pretentious way.  You just sense that this man has something important to say and that being around him will make you feel good.   He speaks in a calm and gentle tone and in all the years we’ve been friends, maybe he’s raised his voice once.  When he speaks to you, you believe in him and in what he has to say.

He is a protector of people and I have been protected by him in many ways, both on the job and in my personal life.  Since I’ve been ill, he has come to my rescue on so many occasions that it’s hard to recall them all, but he was the one that took me to my disability hearings so that I wouldn’t have to go through it alone.  When I had to stop working and go on disability, he bought me an ipad, so that I could keep myself occupied and during the first holiday season that I was sick, he came and picked me up and drove me around NYC so that I could see the holiday decorations.   When I had to move because of my illness, he handled the movers and made sure my apartment was empty and clean.  He makes me feel safe whenever I am near him and he doesn’t even have to do anything but be himself.

But he doesn’t only protect his loved ones, he was the last man out on our floor when our office buildings were evacuated on 9/11.  He made sure everyone else got to safety before he left the building and then he made sure to secure our computer and data systems, so that our company would be protected from downtime and data loss.

His approach to life, when I first met him was very foreign  and strange to me, but as time went on, I began to start to see life as he did.  He was an example of the “law of positive attraction” and he taught me to ask the universe for things and to change my thought process.

Although I am still working on this, as it doesn’t seem to come easily to me, to him, it’s second nature and there is no other way. He never seems to worry about little things, such as checking the bus or train schedule.  He believes whenever he gets to the station, there will be a train waiting for him.  He never worries about finding parking spots because they always open up when he drives on a block.  He  never worries about how much things cost because he believes everything will even out in the end.  He is generous to a fault, to the people that matter to him and I am lucky enough to be included in that group.

This man is one of a kind, and I thank my lucky stars ever night that he walked into my life that day.  When he greets you, he encompasses your body with a big warm bear hug or when he calls you on the phone and says “Morning”  in his southern drawl, you know things will always be alright as long as you have him on your side and in your corner.

 

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The Happiness of your Life

thehappinessofyourlife

I have been listening and watching  self help, gratitude and positive affirmation videos and I really must admit what a positive and refreshing experience it is to hear uplifting thoughts about yourself and the universe.

The real trick is to keep replaying these thoughts in your head and start to belief them.  It’s hard when real life interferes with your perception of how you should be living, but based on what I’m learning if we change the texture of our thoughts, our life will change.

It is hard to change thought patterns when you are in your mid 50s (can’t believe I am in my 50s, but I am).  You have grown up believing certain things and have been doing things in a certain way for so long, that it is hard to change.  But if change means improving your life and being happier with your life, than that is worth trying.

I am going to follow these beliefs and see where my life takes me:

  • All is well in my world and I trust the Universe to take me where I need to go
  • What is right for me will come to me at the appropriate time
  • I am loving and I am loved
  • I am willing to grow and change and I am always open and receptive to new ideas
  • I know I can become more than what I am now, not Better but MORE

Life is as it is.  It’s all about our perception of our current situation and our level of gratitude.  I am grateful for so much in my life and will not dwell on what I can not change.

Vampires Amongst Us

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Vampires are very popular these days, on television, in books and even on the big screen but these vampires are all in people’s fantasies and imaginations. I know a real vampire, real in the sense that this person may not bleed me dry, but does suck all the energy and life out of me. There are many negative people in this world and I unfortunately have one in my life that is a constant reminder to me of what I don’t want to be like.

I am trying so hard to remain positive and work on myself to project positive thoughts and energy. I recently listened to a book entirely about the “Laws of Positive Attraction”. Alot of the messages in the book struck chords with me and I have been making strides towards changing my thought pattern. I have never been a negative, down person, but I am tweeking the way I think and the thoughts that I put out to the universe. I think that’s why being around this individual is so difficult for me because I feel the negativity and bad vibes and I don’t want to attract this into my world.

There are many lines that I find myself repeating from this book. I am constantly saying to myself “wanting, allowing, receiving”. These are 3 things that will open the pathways to positive attraction. What is it that I want in my life, then I need to allow myself to receive them. This takes work, if I want a new car, it is not going to just magically appear on my door step. The law of attraction requires alot of work but this is work that is of a positive nature and can improve your thoughts and your life.

Another important lesson I learned from the book is that we must accept people as they are and not hope that they will change. Tolerating a person is not accepting them because tolerating is a negative emotion and will just cause myself to feel down and negative. I started thinking about my relationship with this friend and realized that for the most part I am just tolerating them and not really accepting their true nature. I either need to adjust my expectations of this friendship and of my friend or I need to walk away from this friendship so that I can continue my journey into the positive light, without backstepping each time I have a visit or phone call from this individual.

I think I am holding onto this friendship because I have lost so much already since I became ill with this chronic condition. How much more will this illness take from me, it’s already taken my freedom, my job, my house and many of my friends. But what I really need to evaluate is if I was healthy, would I still want this person in my life. If the answer is no, then really the illness hasn’t taken this from me because I wouldn’t want the relationship under any circumstances.