Love (in) your Life

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Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and all the world is thinking about Romantic Love, well almost all the world.  While I am a loving person and have felt loved by family, friends and that special someone, this year Romantic Love is the farthest thing from my mind.  I wish I didn’t feel this way and I wish I physically felt well enough and strong enough to be in a relationship, but I don’t and I’m not going to let Valentine’s Day depress me or make me feel bad about myself.

There are so many society rules that make people feel bad and it’s a shame because celebrating should make us feel better about ourselves.  Yesterday I read a post from Celeste of Baking, Butter and Happiness and it really struck a cord with me about how we should love ourselves no matter what every one else thinks.  I have struggled with my weight most of my life, until about 10 years ago.  Obesity runs in my family and most of my female cousins struggle with it.  I am not talking about the extra 10 or 20 lbs, I’m talking about at least an extra 50 lbs.  I didn’t want my life to spiral out of control and finally made up my mind to loose weight.

I did succeed and felt better about myself, but I wish I could have felt just as good about myself before I lost the weight.  Nowadays, since I am unable to move much, I am afraid some of the weight is creeping back on and I hope I do not get down on myself for that.  Attitude is what makes us feel good about ourselves and we struggle every day with trying to feel good because of this illness, that the last thing we need to beat ourselves up about is putting on 5 or 10 lbs.

So tomorrow, I will not be thinking about that special someone, I will be thinking about me.  I am special and need to remember to treat myself well and to love myself.  If Romantic Love is in the cards sometime in the future and I am strong enough and receptive to it, I will welcome it into my life.  But I am comfortable with myself and know that I can go on without that special someone and knowing that is special too.

The 3 “A”s

attentionaffectionappreciation

This morning while eating my breakfast I was listening to one of the morning news shows and Deepak Chopra came on and I started listening more intently.  Before I started on my spiritual journey and began doing daily affirmations and being more aware of the good things I still have in my life, I wouldn’t have glanced up at this man as I didn’t really believe that you could change your world by changing your thoughts.  This morning however, I was very interested in hearing what he had to say.

The anchors asked him about his thoughts on Valentine’s day and he basically said you should show people Attention, Affection and Appreciation every day of the year and not just on one day of the year.   These three things apply not only to a partner but also to family members and friends.

Attention

Attention means deep listening, being totally present. It means we’re not in a hurry to give advice, interrupt or react.

Appreciation

Appreciation means that we notice the other person’s strengths and let them know we notice them and are grateful for them.

Affection

Affection is deep caring and knowing that we are there for the other person.

So this year, let’s skip the Valentine’s day celebration and begin showing love, attention, appreciation and affection to those that mean the most to us every single day of the year (and that also include’s ourselves).